silvertwi (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} silvertwi) wrote,@ 2009-11-07 00:12:00 |
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What is comfort?
You know, I've hung out with several different groups of people. Today I spent time with Janine, Stephanie, and Sandy, who are fellow Questbridge students. I ate dinner with them, then a little later Janine dropped by my room (which is a mess, but at least I managed to get rid of most of the trash before she got there) and then went to the first Ono (Onomatopoeia is an all-female a cappella group) concert of the year with all of them. After, spent a while talking, and then I ended up at my dorm. Where some of the people I like most in 200 Church were. I have no idea why I'm most comfortable among Juliana, Vero, and Ague (not like the illness; it's short for Agueda, and put the spanish pronunciation on it), and Diego, and anyone else who joins them.
I don't think they realize how much I like them, but they let me join them. At the time I joined the group, only Juliana and Ague and a girl-whose-name-I-can't-remember were in the common room. Then Juliana went to Vero's room, and Diego joined our group--we were speaking variously in English and Spanish, with German I didn't understand mixed in. By the way, I'm getting better at understanding Spanish, just not at speaking it, not yet.
But we all ended up in Vero's room eventually, and we were piled on top of the bed, and I was craving human touch, even the small things like pressing against someone like we were all doing. It made me feel...something. Indescribably. I NEED human touch, but I don't get it enough. I just don't make friends easily enough, and I'm not one to just touch someone without feeling a sense of comradeship or getting an invitation (explicit or implicit, doesn't matter). But in high school, once I had my group of friends, we all hugged each other in greeting and leaving, or just because, and I miss that. I get a sense of comradeship--and that may be what I'm responding to with this group. Vero, Ague, and Juliana all went to an international school together before they came here, so they already have a close-knit group, which they've opened seemingly to anyone who wants to join. I like that feeling. It's comfortable. And right now, that, more than anything, is what I need. Comfort.
I couldn't have gotten that at the dance party I had an invite to. I'm glad I stayed here tonight.
And now for my 1667 words, even though I'm ahead, because I need to keep writing or I'll just stop. It might be after midnight, but I still count that as 'today'.
You know, I've hung out with several different groups of people. Today I spent time with Janine, Stephanie, and Sandy, who are fellow Questbridge students. I ate dinner with them, then a little later Janine dropped by my room (which is a mess, but at least I managed to get rid of most of the trash before she got there) and then went to the first Ono (Onomatopoeia is an all-female a cappella group) concert of the year with all of them. After, spent a while talking, and then I ended up at my dorm. Where some of the people I like most in 200 Church were. I have no idea why I'm most comfortable among Juliana, Vero, and Ague (not like the illness; it's short for Agueda, and put the spanish pronunciation on it), and Diego, and anyone else who joins them.
I don't think they realize how much I like them, but they let me join them. At the time I joined the group, only Juliana and Ague and a girl-whose-name-I-can't-remember were in the common room. Then Juliana went to Vero's room, and Diego joined our group--we were speaking variously in English and Spanish, with German I didn't understand mixed in. By the way, I'm getting better at understanding Spanish, just not at speaking it, not yet.
But we all ended up in Vero's room eventually, and we were piled on top of the bed, and I was craving human touch, even the small things like pressing against someone like we were all doing. It made me feel...something. Indescribably. I NEED human touch, but I don't get it enough. I just don't make friends easily enough, and I'm not one to just touch someone without feeling a sense of comradeship or getting an invitation (explicit or implicit, doesn't matter). But in high school, once I had my group of friends, we all hugged each other in greeting and leaving, or just because, and I miss that. I get a sense of comradeship--and that may be what I'm responding to with this group. Vero, Ague, and Juliana all went to an international school together before they came here, so they already have a close-knit group, which they've opened seemingly to anyone who wants to join. I like that feeling. It's comfortable. And right now, that, more than anything, is what I need. Comfort.
I couldn't have gotten that at the dance party I had an invite to. I'm glad I stayed here tonight.
And now for my 1667 words, even though I'm ahead, because I need to keep writing or I'll just stop. It might be after midnight, but I still count that as 'today'.
